This morning Glennis read Psalms 27 to me. She was especially built up by verses 13 and 14, “I would have fainted unless I had believed to see the goodness of God in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He will strengthen thy heart, wait I say on the Lord.”

God has given to us a confident expectation in Him fulfilling a promise of healing He made to me in Oct. 1997 with a verse from Nehemiah (2:4). And again in March 1998, in Arizona, where He appeared to me in a vision. As we wait on the Lord, He has been strengthening our hearts or “inner man” This blessing of knowing Christ in our spirit man, can often times only be achieved when our “outer man” is tried or has to go through severe prolonged suffering or tribulation. 

                                   We don’t always realize how attached we are to our physical bodies or this world; until God brings us to a valley of decision. In this valley, we can choose to praise Him and thank Him for the work that He is doing in our lives because of our trials, or we can choose to forfeit any spiritual growth He intended for us, by being unthankful and withholding praise to Him because of our inability to see with “spiritual eyes” God at work in our valley. 

Last night I was either awake or in a dream, I’m not sure. I was in the spirit and saw the devil trying to choke me but with no power. He was agitated and said, “Why are you still here?” and, “why aren’t you dead?” I replied with the verse in Ps 118:17 “I shall live and not die, and declare the works of the Lord.” 

A few days ago Glennis found a couple of videos from 1999 of me sharing the message of hope that God had given me concerning Nehemiah 2:4, where the king asked Nehemiah, “what is it that you ask?” He said he wanted to go to Judah to rebuild the walls of the Temple so that it could restore hope to his fellow Hebrews.

God also asked me in Arizona in 1998, “what is it you ask?” and “where” did I want to go to serve Him. I said I wanted to be healed and to reach thousands and thousands of souls with the message of hope. Upon His insistant questioning I replied to the question of “where” to be Phoenix, Arizona ( I have since always wondered why I stated that particular location). These tapes reaffirmed the same message that I continue to say today. God loves you, has a plan for your life, and despite your circumstances you too can believe God for a promise, a hope and a future. Believing is not always easy and your body can talk your spirit right out of trusting God when you don’t see any evidence of your promise. This is the place where you can grow the most in your spiritual walk with Christ. Satan always will try to rob, steal and destroy you through unbelief, just as he tried to discourage and kill Nehemiah in the Valley of Ono (Neh 6:2).

Since the Fall of 1996, I began to notice subtle changes in my agility and strength. My body continued to grow weaker, especially my right shoulder girdle and fingers. I saw my family Doctor in Aug ‘97 and she suggested I should see nerve specialists since I could have anything ranging from a pinched nerve to A.L.S. I didn’t know what A.L.S. was until one day in September. A nurse showed me a book on diseases and I looked up A.L.S. I had the same symptoms the book outlined and the life span was 2-5 years, with no cure. This horrified and paralyzed me. Waiting patiently on God in desperate prayer, my arm and fingers twitching,   

In Oct. 1997 (before my official diagnosis) on a Sunday morning before Church I opened my Bible and asked God to show me in His Word what He was saying to me in all this uncertainty concerning my health. God had me open to Nehemiah 2 it was there I read where Nehemiah approached the King with a sad countenance because the city of his people lied in waste with the walls torn down. My heart sounded for joy within me when I read verses 4 through 6 where the King asked Nehemiah, “what is it that you ask?” and Nehemiah said, “If it pleases the King and if I have found favor in your sight, I ask to go to Judah and to rebuild it.” The King said, “how long will the journey take and when will you return?” Nehemiah set a time and it pleased the King to send him.

After meditating on this portion of scripture I called Glennis into the living room and read to her Nehemiah 2. I shared with her what God had spoken to me concerning Nehemiah being distraught because of the condition of Jerusalem and it’s torn down walls, then Nehemiah’s encouragement after the King granted his request to rebuild the walls. I said that I believed God was saying to me that He would rebuild the walls in my body and I would no longer have to worry or be sad because I was not soon to die. We then got ready for Church and when we arrived found out we were having a guest speaker from Maine preach. The guest Pastor said that he had prepared a message that morning but the Holy Spirit had directed him to Nehemiah 2 instead. Glennis and I looked at each other in amazement as we tearfully acknowledged how personal God was to us. We received the message in thankfulness and confirmation . Specifically, God had confirmed to me that Sunday morning that I would be healed. A strong faith rose up in my heart that day, because it came from Him and I knew I could trust Him, though my faith in Him was being tested. God was preparing me for the fiery trials that were soon to come.

Today Glennis, Kylee and I are driving down to Portland to watch Jessica play volleyball. Jessica is #7 in the nation for hitting kills per game. At 5’6 she is the shortest outside hitter in the nation at a D1 school. Their school’s announcer calls her “jumping Jessica”.  Well, Jessica’s team won the game, but on the way down I had been coughing up phlegm and either spitting it on a towel in front of me on the floor or Glennis would suction my throat. As I leaned forward to spit, my seat belt began to work the top off of my feeding tube. I didn’t fully realize this until we arrived in Portland. I told Glennis to close it, but by then my shirt and pants were soaked in undigested stomach fluid. I began to freak out after hearing my wife say she forgot my vest, which would have covered most of me. I told her to pull over off an exit and buy me a shirt, but she said that we were already late for the game and pulling over would be crazy, she said we will find something in the car for me to use to cover me. I couldn’t argue she was driving.

After we arrived at PSU she tried to clip a seat cushion on the front of me, it looked like I had a chair glued to my pants. After another 10 minutes of trying to find a solution and me complaining we finally agreed to slip a blanket under my arm as my thumb was in my pocket to hold the blanket from falling. It looked almost normal and covered most of the problem, so it had to work. I walked in the gym behind Glennis as a shield and found a place in the corner to hide. After the game, Jessica gave me a new shirt that she had bought earlier that day. God had already provided a provision for me as I exchanged the old smelly shirt for a brand new one.

“Now Joshua was clothed with filthy garments, and was standing before the Angel.  Then He answered and spoke to those who stood before Him, saying, “Take away the filthy garments from him.” And to him He said, “See, I have removed your iniquity from you, and I will clothe you with rich robes.”’ Zech 3:3-4

After Church today Glennis had to pick up a few groceries at the local grocery store. I stayed in the car because I had alot of mucus in my lungs that needed to be coughed up. At one point, I looked out the windshield and saw a elderly women pushing a cart, she looked confused and searching for her car. I was still waiting for Glennis to finish shopping, but I thought that I would take this opportunity to pray for the elderly women.

As I was praying for the woman, the Spirit impressed to me that she would speak to Glennis and come in our car, and we would find her car in another area. After my prayer, Glennis came out of the store, met up with the lady, and asked me if she could walk with the lady to help find her car. I quickly said,in confidence “ask her to ride in our car and we will drive her to where her car was”. She agreed and we drove right to her car! PTL!! God answers prayer.

Glennis and I have been fellow-shipping around truths in God’s Word that always minister to us.

1} We are to believe and trust God when He gives a promise in His Word. Mk 11:23 “Whosoever says to a mountain, be removed and cast into the sea, and doubts not in his heart, but believes what he says will happen, will have what he says.” 

2} God sends a trial or test to equip us for the promise. 1Pt.1:7 “The trial of your faith is more precious then gold that perishes, but BEING PROVEN by fire, might be found to praise and honor and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” 

3} God gives us provisions of faith and hope to encourage us along the way.   “Against all hope, Abraham believed in hope. Abraham grew strong in faith as he gave glory to God, being fully convinced God was able to perform that which he promised.” Rom 4:18:20,21. “Be it unto you according to your faith.” Mt.9:29  “I believe it will be the way God said it to be.” Acts 27:25  “We walk by faith not sight.” 2 Cor.5:7